Archive for December 2nd, 2007

really, truly, I do. But, for some reason, I’m just off this year. (OK, it’s no mystery to me why, but I really am just off right now.) Then to top it all off I’m having my first real taste of an Idaho winter. Seriously. All joking aside I think we have had more snow THIS WEEK then we had all of last winter.

That means more driving along ice rinks. That means more slush that you have to slide err wade across when you go anywhere. It’s pretty. It’s nice to look at out the window. I’m really not complaining about the cold. I honestly don’t mind the cold. I’m not even complaining about the snow, really. It just kind of hit me.

We got our first snow last Monday. I had it in MY head it would come on Thursday so I just wasn’t mentally prepared for it. Although lately I’m not mentally prepared for much of anything.

You know what, I’m tired.

You know what else, I just want to complain today. Sometimes complaining helps. Sometimes you just need to VENT. It’s my blog, and I can do what I want. So, today I’m venting. Don’t like it? Don’t read it.

I’m tired of being sad. I’m tired of feeling like there’s a black cloud over my head. I’m tired of feeling like Eeyore while trying so hard to put on a Tigger face. I’m tired of eating dinner alone. I’m tired of listening to my neighbors music rattle my window. I’m tired of listening to someone shovel snow outside my apartment (do you know how annoying the sound of a snow shovel grating on cement is?). I’m tired of always feeling so disorganized. I’m tired of always feeling so overwhelmed. I’m tired of feeling alone. I’m tired of not caring. I’m tired of being confused. I’m tired of not accomplishing anything I want to accomplish. I’m tired of feeling like I’m always ten steps behind. I’m tired of being alone.

Tomorrow’s another day. Tomorrow I’ll get up alone. I’ll spend the day in my office, alone. I might take the time to eat a meal, alone (or more likely I’ll just skip it again because who wants to eat alone). Just like every other day.

Yeah, I’m just mentally and emotionally tired. Exhausted. Drained.

But, tomorrow’s another day.


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